20 Things About India

I know, I promised 50 things about India, but let's start with 20, just for the sake of not turning this into War & Peace.

1. Power Plugs

Indian power plugs look like this:

The socket looks like this:

The ground goes in the top, and the power pins go in the bottom. They usually have 2 sets because you can have 2 different sizes of plugs; standard, and then smaller two-pronged UK style ones ones for light loads.

They have safety covers inside the wall that block the power plugs and don't retract until you push in the ground pin at the top, so you can't accidentally electrocute yourself by sticking a fork into a wall socket (you have to really want it to pull that off).

2. Off Switches

The swich that you saw to the side of that plug socket picture is what their light switches look like. Up is off, down is on, which gets confusing. You'll also find that just about every socket has a switch beside it, which actually turns on and off power to that plug.

I suspect the reason is due to the fact that the plugs are wide and shallow, so you have to grip the whole thing to pull it out, and when doing so there is a definite tendency for your fingers to slip around it and come into contact with the power pins. This happened to me and, consequently, I now always turn off the socket before removing a plug.

3. The 5 Rupee Coin

Although it looks copper-coloured in this picture it's actually a dark iron gray. Interestingly, though, it's just about exactly the size, thickness and weight of a British pound piece, which is itself fairly distinctive in these regards. I do not believe this to be coincidental.

4. How to put on a saree

5. Self Service

You can't do anything yourself in this country. At the Bazaar Store (think Walmart) I tried to put something in a plastic bag because the bag-boy was getting more bags, and I didn't want to stand there and wait. You'd think I'd slapped the bag-boy's grandma. There is an entire class of Indians whose livelihood is utterly dependent on providing unskilled labour of marginal value and trying to do anything for yourself is a direct threat to their welfare. They won't say anything, of course, but still, you have to continuously suppress your instinct to do things yourself lest you make a situation suddenly uncomfortable.

It's a hard thing to suppress.

6. The Indian Head Wobble

Indian people have a habit of nodding their head to the side, or side to side, during a conversation. It is initially very disconcerting for westerners because we have no body language against which to relate it. As it happens, though, once you understand what it is, it's a remarkably useful and flexible expression. It can mean 'yes', but usually means more 'I understand' or 'I will do as you have instructed'. It sometimes means 'I confirm what you have told me' and every so often it just means 'I recognize you and note your presence' (aka the "Hey Joey how are ya").

7. Yes, sir.

Everybody calls you sir. Always. Don't even try to tell them not to.

8. Fashion

India is fascinating in that, not only has western fashion and style not displaced their native traditions, it has in fact been cannibalized by them. In India you will see, all together and simultaneously, people wearing western fashions; people wearing traditional clothes; and people wearing strange hybrid amalgamations of the two.

Women's clothing in particular is endlessly interesting. You will see all sorts of traditional clothing, makeup and jewellery and it all looks good.

As a collary of the above, men's shirts and ties come in colours and patterns that are far bolder and more interesting than anything you'd see here.

9. Bathrooms

All bathrooms I have seen in this country use 'gents' for the men's room and 'ladies' for the women's. I have yet to encounter anything different.

10. The Vegetarian Option

Hindus don't eat beef and Muslims don't eat pork so most places will avoid both of these entirely. All the meat on the McDonald's menu is chicken. You also see an incredible variety and assortment of pure-vegetarian places. Vegetarian food is also incredibly cheap; while you should expect to pay maybe Rs 350 for a quick lunch in the mall, a veggie lunch will set you back maybe Rs 90.

11. Pollution

The pollution in Delhi is amazing. It's like a fog that never goes away. At night the moon is frequently a saffron colour and you can lose sight of buildings two blocks away.

12. It's Hard To Find Good Help These Days

India has a very service-oriented culture but there are amazing quantities of people around who could screw up the simplest thing. When you eat out expect your waiter (and wait staff are always, always male) to screw up at least one thing at your table.

13. Northern Indians

Northern Indians come from the border of Tibet and China, so it shouldn't be a surprise, but even so, it sort of is a surprise the first time you meet someone who looks Chinese but is speaking Hindi like a Delhi local.

14. The Bindi

That's the jewel or stone that Indian women sometimes wear on their forehead when they're dressing traditional. It's not even a 'dressing up' thing; one of the girls in the office usually dresses very western (she seems to like Hello Kitty) but every so often she goes to the nines with traditional gear and jewellery, and wears a bindi. If you were wondering, they have adhesive backings, that's how they stay there.

15. Bollywood Babes

Holy cow. I mean, yowza.

16. Garbage Cans

There aren't any.

17. Gas

Gas is more expensive here than at home. Last time I was at a gas station they were charging the equivalent of $1.15/L CDN. On an Indian salary that's absolutely mind-bogglingly insane.

18. Newspapers

Newspapers are, at least around here, written in English. However, they do not maintain the objective viewpoint that newspapers in the west do. It's very odd to read a fairly conventionally written western style newspaper article veer into outright editorializing whenever a touchy subject comes up.

19. Coke

Coke has more sugar in India. You probably are wondering how that is physically possible. I'm not sure, but by god, they found a way.

20. Educational TV

They have entire channels of educational programming here that run 24/7, presenting math and science to kids of various ages. We watched a program on fractions which presented the subject as well as I've ever seen it presented and then talked about something that I myself did not know. I'd present an Indian variation on the "when we're all speaking Chinese in 20 years you'll know why" joke, except that their English is probably going to be better than ours at that point.